Wednesday, May 16, 2007

The Silent Chill

As much as relationships with your significant other can be absolutely wonderful at times. There are moments when it can feel stressful and cold. Like most healthy relationships there will be difficult moments. You will have different point of views on many issues that may lead to a difficult conversation. Generally this is caused by different life experiences which may provide someone with a different perspective on issues. Life experiences such as a traumatic event or past relationships may make you see other issues as being very insignificant, approaching them in a cold and somewhat insensitive way. This could be hurtful to your companion, even though that isn't your intention. Sometimes during these conversations things are said that may be very truthful, but come off very nasty and somewhat cruel. Sometimes this perspective in life makes you approach the relationship in a more cynical way until a certain time has passed that makes you feel more secure about the relationship and allowing yourself to open up and be more sensitive or generally warmer.
Each one of us in some way would like to feel special and unique to our partner at all times. We want to feel that they understand us as much as you want to understand them. In a new relationship coldness can be a deterrent for a long lasting affair. Coldness can come off as if you don't care, even though that isn't the case. But it can cause irreversible negative effects leading to the end of the relationship.They key thing is to remember that we are all different with different life point of views. Open communication is essential. But if all fails try to think of how what you have said was heard.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Very true.

Being in a couple means to assume two different point of views on everything. Sometimes they will overlap, most of the times they don't -and it's an enrichment, actually. The problem is that most of the times it isn't easy to see that difference of attitudes and behaviours as an enrichment. :-)