Domestic Abuse in Gay Relationships

Occurrence of abuse in same-sex relationships, especially a gay relationship, is well less known. But the amount of abuse that happens is no less than that of a women being abuse in a heterosexual relationship. A study conducted by two researchers from the University of Chicago concluded that 1 out 3 men in a gay relationship experience some form of abuse from their partner. This statistic is in par with the stats of female domestic abuse in a heterosexual relationship.Most men find it difficult to come forward therefore the incidents is underreported. This leads to services that may be less sensitive to same sex domestic abuse, more hostile to queer issues. Therefore leaving the individual with no place to turn too. It's very important that we report any abuse that we experience or know of to ensure that we help each other and build awareness of the issue.

Nature of Abuse:
Abuse in relationships is any behavior or pattern of behavior used to coerce, dominate or isolate the other partner. It is the use of any form of power that is imposed by one partner over the other to maintain control within the relationship.
Abuse includes but is not limited to:

Physical Abuse - hitting; choking; slapping; burning; shoving; using a weapon; physically restraining; intentional interference with basic needs (e.g. food, medicine, sleep)
Isolation: Restricting Freedom - controlling contacts with friends and family, access to information and participation in groups or organizations; locking up in a room / restricting mobility; monitoring telephone calls

Psychological & Emotional Abuse - constantly criticizing, ridiculing (self, family, friends, past); trying to humiliate or degrade; lying; undermining self-esteem; misleading someone about the norms and values of the gay/lesbian communities in order to control or exploit them
Stalking / Harassing Behavior - following; turning up at workplace or house; parking outside; repeated phone calls or mail to victim and/or family, friends, colleagues

Threats & Intimidation - threatening to harm partner, self or others (children, family, friends, pets); threatening to make reports to authorities that jeopardize child custody, immigration or legal status; threatening to disclose HIV status, threatening to reveal sexual orientation to family, friends, neighbors, and/or employers

Economic Abuse - controlling or stealing money; fostering dependency; making financial decisions without asking or telling partner

Sexual Abuse/Harassment - forcing sex or specific acts, pressuring into unwanted sexual behavior, criticizing performance

Property Destruction - destroying mementos, breaking furniture or windows, throwing or smashing objects, trashing clothes or other possessions